Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Get Trucking

We are very impressed by the speed of nasty political attack ads these days, as well as the delightful way that they seem to be funded. First you need to go to some relatively lucid (left-wing, natch) site, and read about the weird-as events of the John Bolton nomination. We suggest Political Animal, because they're very well-spoken over there.

Now visit this collection of weird-ass right-wingers called Move America Forward, and their awesomely cheesy plot to bring down the first Republican to suggest that appointing a walrus-faced loon who advocates disfiguring the UN as UN ambassador is a Bad Idea.

What they've done is put up the text of an ad they'd like too run here, and then wait for the crazy money to come in, and the assault on cable TV will commence. We will reproduce some lines here:

Wife: Honey, were you watching C-SPAN today? Did you hear how disloyal Senator Voinovich was to Republicans and President Bush? Voinovich stood with the Democrats and refused to vote for John Bolton, the man President Bush has chosen to fight for the United States at the UN

Husband: No, I was streaming it on the Internet at the office, but from what I could tell, Senator Voinovich played hookey from the hearings?

We can deduce from this that Move America Forward's ideal couple is:

1) Trapped in a loveless marriage
2) Behind on its cable bill
3) Lying

The insanity of targeting a senator in a moderate state like Ohio is lost on them, unless they are aware of a secret plan for Alan Keyes to screech into town and take over after Voinovich flames out. Who can tell?

While we're on the subject of lunacy, why are there no plans for a Royal Trux singles album. We don't really have the patience to buy all the old ones, but there'd be an excellent best of... there. Like there was with Buffalo Tom. Do you really need more than one album of Buffalo Tom? We dare say not.


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